They’re Closing Hell

T-Shirt Hell, that is. Company founder Sunshine Megatron (of the Chesapeake Bay Megatrons, I believe) is throwing a strop, taking his toys and going home. The reason? People just don’t get his sense of humour, man!


Actually, I sympathise. I’ve always quite liked T-Shirt Hell. Not enough to buy the t-shirts, because I’m just not the sort - I find the idea of wearing a joke everywhere I go a bit tiresome. But I do find the shirts pretty funny, and I think I understand where Mr Megatron is coming from. 

Here’s the t-shirt that broke the camel’s back.


I think that’s funny. It’s funny because it’s outrageous. If it weren’t outrageous - if it were an expression of a person’s actual belief - it wouldn’t be a joke. It’s not a statement t-shirt! It’s a joke t-shirt!

I suppose you can’t vouch for the mindset of the person who buys the t-shirt, of course. That person might actually be a guy who has sex with men and then beats them up afterwards. Because if you were a guy who had sex with other men and then beat them up afterwards, wouldn’t you want a t-shirt about it? I know I have t-shirts for all my crimes!

A lot of the humour is potentially offensive in other ways - it’s sophomoric fratboy stuff about boobies and faeces, ha ha ha - but those aren’t the t-shirts that get the hate letters that have caused Mr Megatron to retreat back down the series of tubes. The problem t-shirts are ones like, “What About All The Good Things Hitler Did?”, and, “Arrest Black Babies Before They Become Criminals”.

Now, maybe you don’t think those are good jokes - maybe they lack the Wildean sophistication you look for in a ticklesome bon mot - but they’re not meant to be taken as serious political platforms. They’re t-shirts designed to mock the stupid attitudes they seem to represent. Get angry at the Holocaust deniers and the racial profilers, not at the people wearing the t-shirts mocking the Holocaust deniers and the racial profilers!

All that said, because the humour comes from breaking taboos and saying outrageous things, Mr Megatron should have known what he was getting into. He knew people would get offended. He’s just upset because they’re offended at him. You’d think a man who made his fortune offending people would be a little more thick-skinned. If he couldn’t take it, maybe he should have just ignored the hate mail?

T-Shirt Hell closes on February 10th, and all t-shirts are 10% off in the interim. If you want to buy some offensive clothing, now could be your last chance. That said, there’s always Burberry.

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5 Responses to “They’re Closing Hell”

  1. Crossoverman Says:

    I’m all for freedom of expression - and some of those t-shirts are hilarious. But I have a hard time thinking that “beat them up afterward” t-shirt is funny because I really have to ask - who WOULD wear it?

    That coupled with this one of a similar nature:

    I’m having a hard time being sympathetic to the guy who runs this site. It’s not enough to say it’s mocking homophobia, when clearly it’s having a laugh at homophobia. And I’m sure this is about me being a sensitive gay, because obviously a lot of those t-shirts would be offensive to Christians. But which of those t-shirts are making fun of beating up Christians?

  2. Andrew Says:

    I think the ‘Queere’ one does fall flat - I assume we’re meant to identify with the guy getting away, not with the mob, but it doesn’t really work because ‘queer’ is such a strong word - but even though I don’t think it’s funny, I still don’t think it’s homophobic - just misjudged. I would actually expect both t-shirts to sell mainly to gay guys, though I wouldn’t be surprised if they don’t sell very well!

    Beating up Christians isn’t a ‘thing’, so it wouldn’t work as a joke.

  3. Jenni Scott Says:

    Some of those t-shirts really are pretty funny (though actually I prefer the more surreal / philosophical ones, like ‘Is it solipsistic in here or is it just me?’).

    Some of them made me wince, too - but ya know, they’re going to do that. The wince level will be different for each person, and that’s kinda part of the point - you and your friends are, by wearing such t-shirts, saying you have a higher wince level than those other knowlessmen who just don’t get it.

  4. Wilfredo Says:

    “It’s Not Gay If You Beat Them Up Afterward” is funny. I feel that it mocks all the rationale of the repressed homosexuals who feel that it’s not gay as long as they’re the ones getting the blowjobs or doing the penetrating. We have plenty of those here in Central America. But there’s no possible way for a t-shirt like that to be marketed.

  5. ewa Says:

    I’m sure I didn’t need that £60 for anything important.

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